I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
