Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
no, he came in my armpit
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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