i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Randomize
