Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize