do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
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