when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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