So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
Acid is not a monday night drug
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize
