We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
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You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
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So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
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