i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Randomize
