Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
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