toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Randomize