margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
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