who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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