is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Mom said you looked used
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
