sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
