I'm laying in your front yard are you home
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Randomize