at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
Randomize
