her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Randomize
