I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
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