and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
