My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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