why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
I'm both gender and math confused
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