discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
