office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Randomize
