Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
