Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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