Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize
