So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize