1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
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