idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
