Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Randomize
