"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Randomize
