Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Randomize
