Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Randomize
