how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
