apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize