I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
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