Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
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