Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Do you have feelings for this penis?
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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