if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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