So drunk, too bad you don't want this
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Randomize
