im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Randomize
