what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Randomize
