Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
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