Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
I'm bleeding and have questions
Randomize
