One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
