he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
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