Me too!
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Randomize
