My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
