Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
